I know this is in the Dominant's section, but I am going to toss my 2 cents in here as well, not so much from the sub perspective, but just another thought...

People don't change. They SAY they change, but they don't. I could cite you 100 examples, but I am going to spare you the time & the space.

People who are poly are poly. People who are monog are monog. If a Dom & sub get together and the sub is strictly monog, and the Dom is strictly poly, it probably isn't going to work. Why? Because PEOPLE CAN'T CHANGE THAT. People are who they are--people like what they like. Sure, you can play around w/kinks & fetishes, but monog & poly are different... it's part of peoples' essence. Now, I am sure other folks will say, "that's crap, delia, I will change for the right person." Really? Will you?? REALLY? Maybe for the short term... but then you will get that itch... if you're poly, down the road a few months to a year, you will want to "branch out"--you will "encourage" your monog sub to "come onnnn, just tryyyy it" and your monog sub will feel pressure, and then it'll start to create a crack in your relationship. And then there goes the ball downhill from there. Or... alternatively... if you are a monog sub & get involved w/a poly dom from the gitgo, you might, after a few months, decide "oh, I am going to change him into a monog dom." REALLY? REALLY? Yeah, ok, give it a go. He will end up meeting people, talking to them online, etc.

Look, here's my point. You aren't going to change who people are. So it's better at the very beginning to figure out who are & who your partner is. If you are different people, you are different people. Kiss, hug, fuck, and move on. If you think you can give it a go, give it a go--but don't be surprised in a few months or years when it starts to fall apart.

It is what it is. Pessimistic? Perhaps.

On the other hand, going into a relationship w/eyes wide open is a hell of a lot more intelligent & better than having your heart broken & "life ruined" when a year down the road Dom-of-your-Dreams crushes you when you find out that he really didn't want to give up the poly life & he has 3 other subs on the side.

Now, when do you talk about this? UP FRONT. It should be discussed before limits are discussed. I would argue poly/monog isn't a limit. I'd argue it isn't part of the kink/fetish discussion. I'd argue it almost tails into the vanilla discussion, closer to the "hi, I'm a sub, and I'm _________ [monog/poly]."

I have seen the bad results all too frequently... don't be someone that falls into the trap of thinking "I can change them." You can't.