Nancy's First Assignment

[nancy]

Thank you, thank you, rose. That is one of the most helpful edits I have ever received. I have printed it out, and will use it to revise the story. I don't plan to do anything with this story, but revising it will help reinforce your good advice.

One of my teachers said that, after writing a story, I should go through it and take out as many words as possible without changing the meaning. I did that with this story, and I thought it was lean. So I was surprised that you found quite a few additional words to remove. Your example will be helpful to me on my next assignment.

In your initial comment you mentioned cliches, and I thought you must be thinking of Rogers comment "You're shaking like a leaf." I left that in because I thought it would be okay in a quotation. Surprise! You agreed. But you found two other cliches that I had missed. I guess the adage is right: cliches are a dime a dozen.

The Writer's Block has been very friendly and helpful, and I am glad to be here.

nancy

[Dragon's muse]

Thank you, thank you, rose. That is one of the most helpful edits I have ever received. I have printed it out, and will use it to revise the story. I don't plan to do anything with this story, but revising it will help reinforce your good advice.

One of my teachers said that, after writing a story, I should go through it and take out as many words as possible without changing the meaning. I did that with this story, and I thought it was lean. So I was surprised that you found quite a few additional words to remove. Your example will be helpful to me on my next assignment.

In your initial comment you mentioned cliches, and I thought you must be thinking of Rogers comment "You're shaking like a leaf." I left that in because I thought it would be okay in a quotation. Surprise! You agreed. But you found two other cliches that I had missed. I guess the adage is right: cliches are a dime a dozen.

The Writer's Block has been very friendly and helpful, and I am glad to be here.

nancy

And we should always avoid cliches like the plaque.

Cliches do work better in dialogue, precisely because they are used a lot in conversation. That's how they got to be cliches, after all. In narrative and exposition, though, we can usually find a better way to phrase it.

rose