Wimps?

[csr]

Well, women’s brains are, in comparatively bigger than men’s, on a weight for weight ratio. I do, however, agree that the misconception that men are mentally superior or more capable has certainly faded.

Actually I believe that it is number of convolutions (folds in the grey matter) that determines intelligence. Unfortunately, the cranium would have to be opened and brain lifted out to count them, so no adding this to any pre-nups .

As for the theory that abuse leads to bdsm, ... It does appear quite likely to me that abuse leads to bdsm in at least some cases. It makes perfect sense from a psychological point of view, as children's brains are designed to mold themselves into what would best please their parents - a necessary survival instinct before laws forced parents to take care of their offspring. A form of Stockholm Syndrome could also occur in adulthood, even with no previous abuse. Of course, I may just be biased since I resemble that theory.

Interesting, but it makes sense that when there are two theories and neither proven, each of us will think the one that makes the most sense is the one that we could apply to ourself most easily. I have no history of abuse, physical or otherwise in my childhood... so for me I can't possibly imagine this to be an environment issue. For you it is the other way.

If the root cause of a sexual orientation is genetic, there’s almost no chance of changing a person’s orientation. If, however, the root cause is environmental, then you would have to say there’s a significant chance that the individual could change their orientation through therapy.

Many gays and lesbians believe that their genes cause their orientation; it's normal, natural, unchosen and unchangeable. Can we assume the same of bdsmers?

This is definitely the way I see it. You could force me to stop, but it wouldn't change the way I feel inside.

Now just like most of the gays I know, I celebrate my difference and enjoy the company of others who are like me. But... if I take a long step back, life really would be more convenient if I were "normal." Having a dirty little secret can often be a hassle for any of us. Hell, if I had to still be a BDSMer, it would be more convenient around here if I were dom rather than sub, to not feel like an outsider amonst the outsiders. But again like homosexuals, I really feel that I can't help being built the way I am.

In the biology vs. environment debate, here is an interesting article, including references:
http://www.geocities.com/southbeach/.../biobasis.html