Psychiatric Help- 5¢

*waving my floger at helish, then taking a dollar and slipping it down somebody's cleavage*

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Originally Posted by delia

~frankee, sheepish, hellish and Rick at group therapy~

hellish: *hits the nerf bat over and over into the palm of her hand* That BASTARD *points to Rick* has the NERVE to tell me he is getting to 2500 posts before me... And then just when i was beating him into submission, he runs off! Friggin WOOSY! And you know, it wasn't like i wasn't doing it for a purpose. i needed something to distract me from the Cum Nazi.
Therapist: The Cum Nazi? And who is that?
hellish: This cruel guy that tells me when i can rub my hoo hoo and cum. And let me just state, for the record, he doesn't even come to my aid in times of need! Just yesterday he posted into this thread on that website and was beating me instead of rescuing me from the LOONS that...

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HEY! Don't call those of us enjoying life LOONS! That isn't nice! :confused:

OMG!! i burned my damn mouth on my hot tea when i was reading this!!

Laughing so hard, i have tears rolling down my face!!!

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Originally Posted by just_annie

HEY! Don't call those of us enjoying life LOONS! That isn't nice! :confused:

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but but...i didn't say it!! ~laughs~

ah face it, you're all nuttier than two fruit cakes!

yeah, frankee and you are the flour that holds the fruit cakes together!! lmfao!

i have to admit that was a good one!!

BRAT! *pinches you HARD right in the.....*


psssssst......*whispers, 'hoo hoo' in your ear*


OMG...i think i'm losing my marbles!

Well is that not the pot calling the kettle black, HELLISH?!?!?!?!

YEAH..what Rick said!!

I thikn all y'all got a few screws loose.

Look who's talking LOL

What? I kind of thought I was the screwdriver.

Good thing it only costs a nickle for this help from what I've seen.

*chuckling* I know I might need a lot of sessions so I gave whoever the shrink is a dollar.

I was thinking about this. Do yo suppose I could get a deal and get two sessions for a quarter?

*rushes back in crying*

I ... I.... cant hold it back! I sleep every night with a sheep! *bursts into tears again* ohh please madame therapist, please help me.. *sobs* I saw this little shepherdess outfit and I couldn't resist buying it *hicups* But now all i can do is think of sheep! *squirms around*

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Originally Posted by sheepishone

*rushes back in crying*

I ... I.... cant hold it back! I sleep every night with a sheep! *bursts into tears again* ohh please madame therapist, please help me.. *sobs* I saw this little shepherdess outfit and I couldn't resist buying it *hicups* But now all i can do is think of sheep! *squirms around*

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God, you really do need help. Where is that help?

Thanks guys... in my "sick" state... I needed this laugh. Only, laughed so hard it brought on a coughing spell. Thinking i might be able to file a malpractice suit against delia...hmmmmmm?

d2p (((((HUG)))) Welcome back. Now I have just one more thing to tell the therapist.

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Originally Posted by dzire2pleeze{M_R}

Thanks guys... in my "sick" state... I needed this laugh. Only, laughed so hard it brought on a coughing spell. Thinking i might be able to file a malpractice suit against delia...hmmmmmm?

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dzire.....i'm glad we could make you laugh....although it all comes from delia's sick little mind!!


and OMG....i laughed so damn hard i almost peed myself!!! LMAO!


Stay tuned dzire!

frankee, I think we should put delia on the Therapist's couch.

dude....i am not the one who's gonna do that!

*looks around scared*

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Originally Posted by delia

~hellish, frankee and Rick gather yet again for a therapy session. This time, they are laying on their backs on the floor on Yoga mats~

hellish: I don't think my man would approve of this
Therapist: You need to learn to be independent, to make decisions for yourself
hellish: I tried that already. Got me in trouble. This seems to work better.
Therapist: Well for right now, your "man" is going to have to take a backseat
hellish: I don't think he'll appreciate that notion
Therapist: He will if you get fixed here
hellish: Oh now, that wasn't real nice...
frankee: I thought it was hysterical
hellish: You would.
frankee: Hey, at least I am the flour. Unlike you, the nuts.
hellish: *rolls over off her yoga mat and grabs a nerf bat from the corner, wanders over to frankee and is about to hit her*
Therapist: *walks over, grabs the bat from hellish, grabs her by the nip, drags her back to her yoga mat and gets her to lay back down*
hellish: I am SO suing you!!!!! You can't touch me! My man would NOT approve
Therapist: *looks at hellish and sighs* We must go back to the first lessons again. You are independent. You enjoy making decisions
hellish: *looks at therapist* I will enjoy beating the hell out of you with this nerf bat soon
Rick: *watches the girls go at it and then lays back down for a nap*
Therapist: hellish, are you suffering from a bout of severe anger? Perhaps over your post count?
hellish: Hypothetically, that is possible
frankee: Oh, it's possible all right. She is just jealous!
hellish: Of flour?
frankee: No, of intelligence

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Okay, that was seriously funny. :D

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Originally Posted by delia

~Therapist hands Warbaby a 5pp questionaire~

Fill this out and we'll get started.

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Butt that is why I'm here. I forgot how to read.

delia!! how the hell are you coming up with this stuff?? i haven't laughed this much EVER!!

i think we need to get Woogs in here for a session, though! ~nods~ maybe you can talk to him about this whole Cum Nazi thing he's got going on...

~going off to find him and drag him back kicking and screaming~

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Originally Posted by delia

~Warbaby busts into the room at the end of the yoga session~

Therapist: Hello. I'm sorry, we're in the middle of a session, as the tag on the door says. Please wait outside in the waiting room
Warbaby: I can't read
Therapist: Ah, okay. Well, please step outside and wait in the waiting room.
Warbaby: But I am WARBABY!
Therapist: Yes, you are. Pleasure to meet you. Now please step outside.
Warbaby: But I am KING!
Therapist: We can talk about those feelings in a moment.
Warbaby: I RULE the lands of FORUMS!
Therapist: We can talk about your... perceptions... and your... visualizations... in a moment. But you must sit in the waiting room for now
Warbaby: There is NO ONE LIKE ME!!!!!
Therapist *mutters, you're damn right about that* Sir? The waiting room.

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Gawd, I do need help if I said all that. Hell I can't remember a thing. I think it best if I just quietly sneak out the back door.

*seeing hellish entering then departing, wondering on the mysterious "Cum Nazi" and pondering telling him to punish hellish for a couple of weeks*

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Originally Posted by RickBulow74

*seeing hellish entering then departing, wondering on the mysterious "Cum Nazi" and pondering telling him to punish hellish for a couple of weeks*

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LOL! the Cum Nazi isn't mysterious!! besides, i haven't done anything to deserve any punishment! so there! ~poking my tongue out~

*nibbling on yer tongue* I am sure Cum Nazi will think of something to kep you busy for 2 weeks or so, hellish

naww, he wants me to beat you too! ~giggles~

ready to admit defeat yet? ~pinchin ya~