Pegao
Registered User

Thanks for the welcome!

Control freak, yes I know that notion well! I admit that (as I actually ended posting about on the forum) I have been debating about the difference (more or less important) between bottom and sub lately, as giving up control is really not something comes remotely naturally to me. I admit that I'm glad to be able to speak with someone else who also turned switch for the right person!

If communication isn't there, relationships of any kind, even when they don't get sentimental/sexual, don't function. And I hear you about learning it before, that without communication it doesn't work. I'm still surprised at times, I am actually able and enjoying giving up some control with Keltar. I still have more to explore about that with him, but so far it's really been going well. Yet, I know that except with him, I just can't give up control.

i dont see any other way for a relationship to work.. for me. even vanilla relationships i had before.. if communication failed.. so did everything else.. learned that lesson pretty good already.. i think especially.. considering i dont naturally give up any kind of control.. it really only works for me if its with somebody that is especially good about limits and respect.

I'm always *facepalm* when I see people not even talk about simple things such as hobbies or things like that. So when it comes to sex, there are even basic things they can't communicate about, even less when it comes to anything remotely "kinky". *sigh* This is great that Deity and you have such a close bond and are able to talk so much, I know that this is something that I appreciate a lot about Keltar as well, as he always is respectful and listening to my limits.

Yeah some people (even vanilla ones as you say) just don't get the whole communication aspect. That's really something that blows my mind!

Starting with friendship is a good thing in my opinion (I'm biased as Keltar and I started like that too!) as it indeed helps a lot to get to know one another. Communication being crucial, that helps a lot. It's nice to talk with someone who is/was in a similar situation.

I'm not very sub either, and it's something I'm exploring since Keltar and I got together! Otherwise I'm really dominative, and indeed we're looking for a girl, so that I can enjoy both and he can have a real sub too! We didn't have the opportunity to do it yet, and this is why we are searching!

I found it interesting to read about what brought the inner sub in you to see how our stories are kind of similar!