As noted from those above, certainly a thoughtful consideration. All of us were new at something and at sometime. Giving consent, for me, refers to understanding what I am offering and what I would expect or like in return. Hence communication is a prevalent, discussion, getting to know each other. I would consider this as deeply important within a D/s relationship as I deem this more appealing, personally.

When with another within the relationship, it would come down to whether the other’ person really cared? Regardless of bdsm, consider those that of a one night stand, they want little except a brief encounter. This is what you suspect, and require, then fine, if not don’t go there. When another is taken into the wonderful world of what can achieved, it requires a dynamic to form, to exchange thoughts and knowledge that certainly necessitates trust of those involved. Those that want a ‘one’ night would not want to know’ the other, just their needs, emotional, physical, or psychologically met, with no consideration of the other involved.

Therefore the ‘newbie’ must and should consider carefully. What is required of them and do they feel secure. If in doubt, don’t do it, in my mind. Yes they may be new to the life style but you wouldn’t want to take a taxi home with a stranger covered in blood wielding an axe and a menacing smile.

The actual play’ should be as determined, safe, sane and consensual. So make a choice, if wrong know you thought this through and move on to another that is able to provide this love and security.

As with all things in life you live and learn?

Regards Sett