That makes a world of sense, by the way. The little research I've seen on subs highlights a perfectionist streak in them, but it's linked to a need to please. Maybe "if I'm perfect, I'm pleasing"? Some of the subs I've known have been exceedingly successful, independent executives and leaders in their professions. They're glad to lead and gladder, it seems, to get home and stop. I'm not sure but I've imagined an analogy to peeling off pantyhose after a long day at the office. They were appropriate at work and they weren't awful ... until you imagine how good it will feel to be rid of them and free.
Perhaps you are the perfectionist chipmunk were sisters separated at birth? She is glorious in her determination to tolerate no slips on her own part, while uncommonly generous in her refusal to notice mine.
You are, separately and collectively, wondrous.
S.