Wow, you all are so insightful. Thanks for taking the time. I knew this was the place to come with such a question. Now i can go back to my subbie and pretend to be all knowing and insightful. I'll be able to pull it off for the rest of the week since she doesnt have internet access till sunday, lol.

I must say, from the dom perspective, humilating another is a rush also. Like Aisa stated, I spend 99% of my life trying to being repectful and non-hurtful to others (even when they are being asses dont deserve it), and to know that i have an occasional outlet through my partner, and that she receives it, wants its, and gets off on it without actually hurting her feelings gives me a chance to 'unbottle' those pent up emotions that build during 'normal life'.