That all sounds great but to try to clarify again: I think you may be overestimating the level of organization and coordination of the BDSM community. Again, there is no "we all" who watch or accept or judge. Everyone's just people. Mostly that's good, but there's something dangerous there too that people don't always get: pretty much no matter what twisted shit a person can come up with, they can find a group or chat room or mailing list or forum out there that will validate them and tell them that it's right. Conversely there are an awful lot of dangerous people out there who are happy to suck in new folks by claiming they are in a position to teach or judge.

All that is to say that while I hope you are made welcome, make a ton of friends, learn a lot, get great advice and guidance, and have a great experience that lasts a lifetime, you should not and can not rely on "the community" to validate you or put a stamp of approval on you. It's actively dangerous for you and for any potential subs or slaves you might have someday to not take control of your own learning process. If anyone tells you that "we're all watching, and we think X" then that person's a liar. If anyone tells you that "in order to be accepted you must Y" then that person's a liar too. Be SSC, make friends and grow, but you must must must take responsibility for and ownership of your own path.