"1) The use of the word "one" or "one's" when people try to describe a persons actions or feelings. "It all depends on how it affects one's feelings..." This conotation pops up all over the place and it drives me crazy."

Man oh man but one hates that. I mean really, it's a cheap trick to try and make it sound like they're smart when they're giving an opinion, and all it does is make them sound like Prince Charles.


"2) At some point, in every BDSM story, you'll read this sentence "I stepped back to admire my handiwork.""

Damn it all, I've gotta confess this is a stock line of mine when I cyber. That's one strike for the rallan.

"3) Political correctness gone bezerk when P/people decide that it's appropriate to make sure T/they don't offend O/others by using ambiguous C/capital and S/small letters. Give it a rest, we get the point."

And now I know that I've found a good site. I've only been perusing the online BDSM community for a little while (and I've only been perusing real-life BDSM fun for even less time), but I'm already getting seriously ticked off by that whole always capitalising Dom pronouns and lower-casing sub ones. Screw it, I might use the lower-case i now and then (not reliably though), but damned if I'll use words like A/all just because there's doms and subs in the same chatroom. I came to have a bit of a chat, not be part of some hideously elaborate game of grammar bondage.

"4) People who reffer to themselves as the third person. (especially submissives) "Sir, this little one would humbly request to go to bed." "This ones stomach is grumbling because she's hungry." ARRRG! I know this is heavy in the Gor lifestyle, but it drives me batty."

To each their own I guess. Although there's a time and a place for staying in the role, and it shits me no end when people talk that way while they're discussing totally unrelated stuff ("Sirs, this one hopes England will win the Rugby World Cup").

"5) The need for people to try and impress by using old victorian English while in chat or posts. "How is thou this eve?" Please folks, Hamlet has left the building."

I have absolutely nothing to add. Not even a sarcastic reply starting with verily or forsooth.

6) Mistresses seeking financial slaves. Enough said.

Yeah I'm kinda iffy about that myself. Being a professional is one thing, but dressing prostitution up as an extra layer of kinky dominance and submission in a relationship just strikes me as a fairly callous way of exploiting desperate guys.

"7) Chat rooms that are dominated by a couple cyber playing in the main chat window. Private message windows are a wonderful thing and free of charge."

Alas and alack I can no longer get IRC to work, so that's one thing I don't have to deal with.

"8) Unrealistic scenarios of D/s portrayed as everyday activities. "My Dom makes me kneel in the corner on thumbtacks for 10 hours for punishment"

Hey that happened to me once. I had to service three hundred randy Doms in an afternoon but only managed two hundred and seventy, so they all extinguished their cigarettes (did I say cigarettes? make that cigars, and two each) on my back at the same time before the thumbtack thing

9) Fakes, Professionals and attention getters who aren't into BDSM because they've known for a very long time that they were different, but are here for profit, thrill or boredom alone.

Well professionals (as long as they're honest and not into that cash-slave business) are no big deal. I don't seem to bump into many in chats and forums. And the fakes and attention getters cluttering up chatrooms today could well be the Doms and subs who'll finally get up the nerve to try something in real life tomorrow.

"10) BDSM preachers who claim that their views are the way it should be, and you should share in that opinion."

Ditto. Especially the ones who look down on everyone who doesn't take BDSM as some deadly serious lifestyle decision. You know the ones, they look down their noses on vanilla couples who occasionally experiment with handcuffs or a spanking, and spew out big diatribes about how switches are "only playing at bdsm", and how nobody Tops better, bottoms better, or wears tighter pants than they do.

"11) The stigma that all submissive men are sissies, whimps and doormats. Some of us kneel proudly and strongly, but only for the right person."

Let's be honest, I'm a wimp. A thin, please-don't-hurt-me, utter wimp without an agressive bone in his body

But I'll agree that I don't like that stereotype. Everyone I've met who's into BDSM is perfectly ordinary the rest of the time. Some Doms and Dommes are agressive all the time, others are mild as milk. Some submissives are a pushover all the time, and some are cranky buggers who'll dig their heels in and argue about everything. But (and I know I'm preaching to the converted here), by and large we're all just ordinary folks who happen to get turned on by some unusual stuff, and like any other ordinary folks out there, what we like in the bedroom isn't going to be something that governs every single thing we do. Well, exept for the lucky few in 24/7 relationships



Rallan