Not much I can add to all that. Boy did I get here late.

Now the following are merely my thoughts, nothing more.

First up kelly, please don't aplologise for rambling- we'd all be banned if that was a problem- me first probably...

By saying that, it shows you may not have found your place in the world just yet- to my mind a happy sub is one who knows what she wants & won't settle for less.

Yes don't even consider a Dom/me who pushes you when you're starting out. A big part of Domliness is to reassure the sub & make sure she's OK at all times. To be concerned with every bit of their welfare.

Having said that, we all have doubts from what I've seen.
This is a journey of discovery.

I talk to many subs who have doubts- I say two things to them. Make sure you have the right person to explore with, someone who's a friend first & foremost & respects your reluctance. Someone who can tell you it's OK if you want to stop. Someone who tells you it's essential to be able to do that.

The other is to know what you want- what is OK & more importantly what isn't. That of course comes with finding yourself in the first place.

Hey I don't know if anyone mentioned this- D/s is meant to be fun?

Oh & I'll tell you a secret- Doms are not all wise & are not always right.

(you should hear some of the ballsups I've made....)

Tojo