How did you know?

[cariad]

That this lifestyle is what you wanted?

I know that I have an overwhelming desire to please, as well as fantasies about being dominated.

Returning to your original question...

I had the usual series of vanilla relationships through school and college, some with people who I cared deeply for. However they always hit a brick wall, and I more or less came to the point of deciding that relationships and me were just not to be.

I then met the man I now live with - and wow - there was something different about him, and with hind sight that difference was his Dominance, although in the early stages of our relationship there were none of the usual signs of BDSM, in fact quite the reverse.

Bottom line for me is that I do not fancy men who are not Doms. The play parts are wonderful, and I would not be without them, but there is a certain something about a quiet confident Dom personality which does it for me each and every time.

I think it is absolutely, positively possible to be both a strong-minded, independent woman and a good sub. Like Silke said, it's not a sign of weakness to give up control; in fact, I think it's the ultimate form of control. You say who, when, where, and under what terms you'll give up control. Someone who's weak can't do that.

Could not agree more with you maddie - and any Dom who wanted me as a doormat would soon be given his marching orders back out of the door!

cariad