How did you know?

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I found I was mostly scared. Paranoid. Actually found I was once again developing an intense feeling of dread. Not about anything specific, but more a feeling that everything was going to come crashing down on me, and there would be nothing I could do to stop it.

Contrasting paranoia, or self doubt is very difficult to work with when the submissive feels this way. Not only does she not trust me as the Dom. She doesn't trust herself as the submissive. When the submissive doesn't have trust in the Dom or herself, it makes it diffucult for her to actually submit, in a scene or in a relationship.

How did I know this lifestyle is what I wanted. Well I lived the vanilla lifestyle, didn't like it, then lived this lifestyle for awhile, and once I did, knew I would never be able to return to the vanilla way of doing things, cause I enjoyed this way of doing things so much more.

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