Blocking, Followed by Rapture

[woodsman'sgame]

Hi Shadoom,

Have you sat down and talked to her? I mean really talked to her?I know I felt guilty about my submissive desires for a long time. (Catholic too) Have you two discussed it thoroughly? Until the last few years I would not have been comfortable really talking about it, but hell I felt guilty for masturbating for years (even when my hubby wanted me to). For me it was the Catholic upbringing. The older I get the more I realize that the guilt that was drummed into my brain about sexuality was wrong. Thank God I had enough sense not to drum a lot of this guilt into my own kids. If I had followed what the church taught me I would have been repressed sexually and been a poor partner for my husband. Thank God (Yes I believe in God) that my sexual drive was stronger than the guilt, and I was able to enjoy sex with my husband despite my upbringing.
My hubby and I tried the BDSM stuff on and off over the years too, but I didn't let him know that I felt guilty. I kept it in because I knew that it would make him stop if he knew and deep down I didn't want him to stop. I was torn between the desire and the guilt. Now I know that there was nothing wrong with the desire. Just because someone else doesn't like it doesn't mean it's wrong. Why do we judge people on their sexual preferences? We don't think someone is evil or sick because he likes boxing or football and they are very violent sports. Why am I evil or sick because I like to be tied up and spanked or whipped? Why is my husband evil because he likes to fulfill my fantasya nd gets turned on by it? I'm much less likely to end up with a broken arm or leg after playing my game than a football player is after playing his.
Maybe your wife is feeling a lot of the things I felt. Coming to this site and seeing that a lot of people with happy marriages and/or stable relationships enjoy BDSM and seeing that they are sane, happy people helped me a lot. Has she been to this site and done some reading in the forum? That may help her feel more comfortable.
Just some possibilities for you to consider.
By the way, my hubby and I have been married for 30 years. Congratulations on your twenty.