I wish there was something to be said to make it all better, but unfortunately life just sucks some times. But I do believe that everything happens for a reason, and that it will all work out for the best, for you, in the end.
You just have to have patience. Can you believe that I just said that? Me??
Please take comfort in the fact that you have many friends here that are always willing to lend an ear. Even those who seem to have drifted away are never that far when you need them.
I am quite suprised that they give away rainbow coloured hats with propellers on the top as prizes in surfing competitions. You really should post a picture of that sometime...