A movie like the Secretary is a great idea, it can give you an opportunity to wax on the romantic side of BDSM. Also, if you remember in the totally unrelated movie, Along Came Polly, when the best friend character tells Ben Stiller to give Polly a swat on the behind during sex. This is a great entry. If she reacts poorly then you can just say that you were very caught up in the moment, if she reacts well then you can do it again...

...and to say it in plain english, take it slow. I can hardly think of a girl that I did not put into a submissive postion, but it was never intentional. It is just my "thing" to hold a girl down, or give her a swat, 65% of the time, it works every time.

Nothing will get you where you want to be quicker than open and honest communication. It's kind of like asking directions to an unfamiliar place. Try out some suggestions here and then after you and your lady have finished, ask her how she felt about it. There is a stigma in straight society, I am sure that no one here really likes to think there is, but that is a fact. Let her know that this is what you want and if she were game, it would allow your love to blossom into a whole new level.

If she is not game then my heart goes out to you my friend. You may just have to deny your inner cravings or make an even more difficult decision. I hope that it all works out well. Keep us updated.