Quote Originally Posted by ReqSpec View Post
I am thinking... D/s relationship is not only limited to lovers, i am thinking about parents and kids
My alpha just sent me her response to this post for my approval, so I thought I’d come see for myself. And, frankly, I am struggling to be polite!

That is, I hasten to add, no reflection on anyone who has posted an opinion here. What saddens me is that this entire topic is actually based on a fairly accurate description of how many people choose to bring up their kids. For many people, parenting is a power-struggle — a struggle to achieve and maintain dominance over their offspring in a battle for control.

And that is just such a fucked-up philosophy it makes me want to spit blood! And I do not mean my own blood! Forget cultural & religious differences. Forget about philosophy, morality and everything else metaphysical. As a parenting strategy, thinking D/s is wrong simply because it does not work! Unless, of course, one’s definition of success is to add yet another batch of fucked-up people to an already fucked-up world!

Having watched my first-born son die in front of me, I know children for what they are — a gift of evolution given to enrich our lives and perpetuate our genes. They are not born slaves, under contract until they reach the age of majority. They are not our possessions to do with as we please. They are new people — strangers on a foreign shore. Childhood is a relatively modern concept. I think our ancestors had it right. Children are individuals in their own right who simply have the misfortune of needing to wait a couple of decades to acquire the mental & physical tools they need to express their adult individuality.

Until then, they are in our care. As parents, we are their guardians, charged by Nature with a duty to watch over and protect them until they can fend for themselves and hopefully have children of their own. It’s not about ruling and/or moulding them to our liking. It's about helping them to grow and become the best person they can be — their OWN person! It’s about being their mentor and life-guide — about saying, not “do this or else”, but rather saying: “these are the options and my recommendations, but it’s your life so choose, knowing you’ll have to live with the consequences of your decision!”

There is no D/s dynamic involved in that — no power struggle or battle for dominance and control. Let’s face it, ultimately we are all subject to the will of the Universe whether we like it or not. Teach that lesson to your children and Life will take care of the rest. As parents, we just have to be there for our kids to make sure they survive the learning experience.

I have two living children I can admit to, by the way. Both are now grown-up (officially anyway) but I brought them up mostly as a lone-parent. In other words, I’ve been up feeding them in the middle of the night, I have cleaned up their shit, dried their tears, nursed them through illness and a lot more besides. My reward is to see them as they are now — two people of whom I can be proud because they have every reason to be proud of themselves!

A final thought — parenting is about raising children to be capable of living without us in the hope that they choose not to.


PS: Sorry, alpha, but you know me. St Jude ialways was my patron saint. you can speak now.