I am sure that my present interests stem from an event that I experienced when I was twelve.I am not an author so please excuse my lack of story telling skills. I was staying at my Aunts house for the summer and one day her daughter,Pam, (who was the same age as me) and I got caught trying to steal sweets from our local shop.We were taken back to my aunts and made to admit to her what we had done. After she had promised the shop-keeper that she would deal with the matter we were sent to our respective rooms. A little while later we were summoned into the lounge and made to stand before her while she berrated us for our actions. At the end of our 'telling-off' she told me that I could either be punished now with Pam or I could wait for her to tell my parents when I went home.......being more scared of my dad than my aunt I chose the former option. Quite calmly she said that she was going to spank our bare bottoms and that we were to get undressed. Although my mind was in a whirl, it was obviously the accpeted punishment in this household because, with the exception of complaining that she didn't want to do it in front of me, a complaint quickly dismissed by her mother, Pam didn't seem shocked by the order.
Although I have a vivid memory of the actual event, the emotional aspects were and still are a blur. I know that I felt embaressed standing naked in front of my cousin and aunt but my arousal at the situation was all too plain to see. Was the arousal the result of my embaressment or was I embaressed at being aroused? All I know is that watching my naked cousin being held over my aunts lap while she had her bottom spanked is the singal most exciting thing I have ever seen. Even when I caught my aunt looking at me with a smirk on her face I still had to keep watching. After Pams spanking was over and she was sent back to her room, my aunt called me toward her and pulled me over her lap. During the spanking she gave me she kept saying how she knew that I had enjoyed seeing Pam nude and what a dirty and naughty boy I was. After my spanking when she told to get up. As I did so she grabbed my penis saying "I suppose you will play with yourself now?" That was it, the moment her hand touched me I came. I could hardly breath. She said nothing......just gave my penis a squeeze and looked at her cum soaked hand. After what seemed an eternity but was probabley only a minute or so, she just smiled and told me to go to bed. The fact that I masburated that night was used by my aunt on a number of occassions as a precursor to similar punishment sessions throughout that summer. Despite my best attempts, I could never draw Pam into a discussion about her feelings on that afternoons events athough I would love to know how she felt.
The strange thing is that it was seeing her get spanked that turned me on the most and still does. Maybe my interest in punishing submissive girls and women is the thought that they will experience the same embaressant and shame that Pam and I felt.......shame at being nude; shame at being punished and shame at being aroused by it all. I would be interested to hear of others first experiences and their reactions to them. [sr@btconnect.com[e-mail]