How do you know if a person is a sub ?

[julia_j]

i have a somewhat high stress job where i am definitely in control. i, however, like giving that control up in the bedroom (or wherever!) because it gives me a lot of leeway to do things i would never do otherwise - it takes the power away from me and i can just enjoy everything without worrying or overanalyzing everything. there are so many things i have done that i would have NEVER done otherwise. looking at me, talking with me, you would never know.

[Desdemon]

I was approached by someone who wanted to take pictures of me, because I was ( i think) his body type, and present a very powerful persona. After 10 days of email flirting, and an hour or so of taking pix, he knew I was a sub, even if I didn't (yet). Huh. I suspect he knew almost immidiatly after we began exchanging emails, now that I think about it. ;p

We met entirely outside of the BDSM scene as well.

I don't know where you are or your age, but here are some suggestions if you are looking outside whatever 'scene' is in your area: Find someone you are drawn to. ask simple but open ended questions. Flirting is a great way to break the ice, especially as if you push a potential boundary you aren't locked into having outed yourself, if you desire not to at first.