Well, I just got done reading this second assignment. Aside from the few things Muse pointed out there is little to complain about.

One thing I particularly appreciate about your writing is the clarity. You are relatively efficient in word usage. More so than most authors I read - much more so than I am. Simply put, your writing reads.

The next level will test you a bit more. Your weakness, as you already admitted, lies in character development. I am confident that you will manage to improve in that aspect with relative ease.

Dean