Id have to disagree as well...though more with the word "won't"...when you sumbit (to me at least) you end up having the ultimate power since you are in control of how far things go- you dicate what your like, dislike, what you can handle, etc.

and just cause i cant help commenting on it...
i dont think bdsm is sugarcoating anything about sex or life...quite the opposite, really. yes, there are limits, rules, thigns to be considered. But bdsm is not structured around the expectations of the "rest of the world", rather, it allows us to break free of that to experience (dare i say with carnal desire?) true lust, which is often squashed in everyday life for most of us.