A bittersweet end to a doomed passion. It's well written and conveys a submission to despair that is at times overwhelming. Definitely not my choice in erotica but you present it well.
Now to pick nits, in the biological world esophagus and edema don't start with an 'o' nor is there an 'o' in apneas. (sorry it's the influence of Mr. Dean).

All in all a well polished tragic tale.
Mad Lews