I do not think this is all horrible. yes.... a limit was pushed BUT... I have had many of my "hard fast limits" pushed.. and now I love them.
I used to refuse to do wax.. I HATED it... it is still not my favorite thing.. at all.. in fact.. its nearly punishment. Ocean Soul used to use it for just that.... now.. I realize that in certain times of play it could be fun.... had he not pushed my limit.. I'd have never known.
Checking to find a limit is not bad.... it can help your sub grow... but just as she must trust him to know her limit... he must trust her to know hers.
It is not fair of us to always say he should be able to read our body language... can you imagine you are blindfolded.... he can't see your eyes... you smile.. yet you are crying beneath.. your pussy quivers in pleasure.. your body shutters in disgust.
How will he read you?
It takes time and great skill to fully Master the art of reading body language. They are Doms.. not Wizards.
One should NEVER feel ashamed about safewording.. EVER. It is not a bad thing. I understand about not wanting to disapoint.. BUT.
Have you ever stopped to think about the amount of trust that goes into a safeword? It means you trust him enough... you know he loves you and cares for you enough to stop.... he loved you enough to push you.. to making you soar to new heights... etc. It is not a negative.. it can be a positive thing.
Everyone has their own methods... perhaps for this Dom and his sub. it acheieved what he wanted.... but for others it may not work... I don't think this was at all abusive... it is important for a sub. to be able to say enough! and for the play to stop. subs have sub space... but we tend to forget.. Doms have Dom space.... it is our job to make sure we bring them back down from their high so they can offer the care and protection they so want for us.
-STEPS OFF HER SOAP BOX-
-anya-