This is personal and full of spelling errors. This is a rant about something I've experienced yet again. So take it or leave. If the shoe fits wear it( before you say it don't fit make sure its on the right foot)

I've been in the lifestyle full time for 9 years now, and sceneing for a while, playing the online game even longer, and reading/writing about it for a hell of alot longer. Mush it all together you got about 15 years total in there that I have been involved at some level.

My slave and I have often had an additional submissive even one for each or more then one for each since we have been together. we were poly even before we went full time into the lifestyle.

For me one of my greatest passions is training, I love to take a girl that has only limited or no experience in the scene. Teaching her etiquette and protocol (Old Guard way) teaching that the being a submissive is nothing to be ashamed of and helping her grow and nature then letting her move on to find her own Master.

It seems fairly common (and I’ve just finished reading a threat on married and cheating in the BDSM community) that married women who are looking for a kink relationship can’t often find it at home. There husbands are so ingrained in there head about women’s rights (part of that right is the right to say I want to be treated like this) or you never hit a woman (you do when she begs really nicely). So these married women get permission and go out to find there dark evil sadistic Master to fulfill all there wicked fantasies.

But what these and many other submissives seem to forget, is regardless whether or not they have a BDSM relationship at home, they still have a husband at home who is a Master of sorts, you may be equal in the relationship, but your sceneing and playing by his permission. Also, you may have kids, kids are another type of Master, in the sense you have a strong responsibility to them.

To add another Master to that equation complicates things tremendously, First you have to get your husbands permission before you can spend time with your BDSM Master, Then you have to make sure the kids are going to be taken care of, THEN you can go play. That puts the one your suppose to be submitting to on the third rung under 2 other Masters. What if you’re a career minded woman and your job puts heavy demands on you? That’s another Master to contend with.

After all that and with all that how can you honestly devote and give yourself even for a short period of time to serve another?

If you do not have time to assume the role you want so badly, even if that time is predestinated and only short durations and you still can’t do it. Don’t keep bouncing from Master to Master looking for the “One” who is “Strong enough” or whatever it is you seem to think was wrong with the last one. Maybe he released you cause he was tired of waiting around and you never seemed to have time.

If you don’t have the time, don’t take on the role under the pretence of serving in a relationship, call it what it is a kinky fuck buddy you go see on the weekend who you play out his or your fantasy’s with.

To be fair to the flip side, cause I have seen this as well, Dom’s don’t harvest yourself some big stable of slaves. If you don’t have the time for your wife and kids how the hell are you going to have time for a slave?

Learn the word commitment people and when you make one keep it.