Quote Originally Posted by duktig flicka
I am really, really, really dying to know what psychological effect bdsm has on a person. Is it harmful? Is it therapeutic? None of the above? Am I exploiting my boyfriend for the sake of vain self-loathing by taking part in it with him? Would it be possible to "get rid of it" and start enjoying vanilla sex? Or is it just harmless fun?
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my past history is very similar to yours and am a psychology major. bdsm in general is not harmful when kept sane safe and consensual. i have found bdsm to be very theraputic. My father was extremely abusive, physically and verbally and the things that hated are now some of the things take most pleasure in such as being hurt or verbally degraded. Since i have met my Mistress i have been able to come to terms with very many things that have happened. for me....i have had certain flashbacks in the middle of a scene which can be a very scary thing for the sub or the Dom/Domme. It seems to be a really bad thing to happen but these flashbacks for me have been repressed memories. After acknowledging these memories without trying to, i have been able to come closer and closer to not letting anything that has happened to me effect my thoughts in anyway. i have made sure the my Mistress knows of these things so She knows that there is a possibility to encounter these. It is good that your Dom/Domme know about your background especially if you were abused in any way. I hope any of this helps you.