Quote Originally Posted by Decadence
Can anyone offer me some advice please?

After a year of 8 hour long phone calls each day I decided to meet the man of my dreams, the man who truly opened me up.

However there is a side of me which needs the sexual release as well. He knew all this before we even met, he knew my tastes, likes and dislikes. Now in person he was refusing any attempts to have a sexual relationship.

I then met a local man who was again my dream. Then history repeats itself, which is why I ask for advice.

Why don’t they want the sexual part?... they are happy with a blow job each morning and night but that’s about as far as they want. I long to be taken, which I have a few times but then they seem to back off as if too scared to go any further. I do know that older men don’t have the libido they had when they were young but crumbs…. Why, if they know they don’t REALLY have the desire, do they not say so in the beginning???... or is it my fault?
I quoted the parts above because I think maybe your expectations are a bit high. In both cases you said you met your dream Dom. Honestly I wouldn't want to be labeled anyone's dream. The pressure would be way too much. No one is ever going to measure up to a "dream". I talked to another recently and suggested she was maybe looking for a "White Knight" to rescue her from all her problems and let her live "happily ever after." Unfortunately most Doms are just real people with all the real problems and afflictions of anyone else.
As to not being able to get the sexual activity or intensity you need, that is a communication problem to a point. I think some men are not as forth coming with their sexual needs as they should be. Also, some would be very reticent to discuss their inability to satisfy a woman sexually. As to age, that is a red herring. I am over 50 and have never been faulted for a low libido. Also older men can utilize drug therapy to assure that performance is never an issue.
It really comes back to the Dominants ability to be honest with the submissive in this very sensitive area. I think if you tone down your expectations a bit and then talk openly what you need and want, you might be able to find a man who can Dominate you and also satisfy your sexual desires.
Good luck and I hope you meet the "One" who completes you.


Sir William