Why are so many BDSM girls fat and ugly??

[Imegnixs_Cinder]

ok before anyone shoots me, please read my whole post here.
I have noticed that many subs and Dom/mes alike in BDSM are overweight.
However I have a theory on this.
BDSM is not based upon looks, in the nilla world people tend to see someone who is good looking and instantly chase after them, it is looks that first attract. Whereas in BDSM the emphasis is far more upon the mental capability of that person, i.e. how much they give as a sub or how strong they are as a Dom/me. In BDSM we tend to talk much much more and get to the know the person underneath the looks, this is ESP true o/l we talk, subs open up and reveal who they really are, their deepest fears and desires are laid out before the Dom/me and in the nilla world we just don't see that as much if at all.
I belive that people are drawn to BDSM as its meant to be a non judgmental lifestyle, so overweight people can be themselves and know that the Dom/me / sub isn't looking at what they look like, but they are looking at who they are inside.
And in case anyone is curious, yes I too am overweight, but I was underweight when I first discovered BDSM.

[csr]

You may have something there. On Sat I was at a craft fair that was exclusively for BDSMers and was thinking about how the atmosphere in the room was so friendly and accepting, even to total strangers--especially since it was an open event and not a munch or a play party at all.

Another thing... that IMHO goes along with this, is that people in the scene tend to be comfortable with their appearance--and I think that makes them even more attractive. You walk into a room like that and see what could be considered large-sized women dressed in sexy, revealing tops and sporting a beautiful smile to match.

My partner and I are both considered "acceptable" weight for our height, but I definitely look underweight--and have always been a little conscious of my skinny arms. I would _definitely_ say that we were in the minority in that room, but once again--it is an accepting crowd, who would no more stare at us than expect that kind of behaviour in return.

THAT, right there...is beauty.


BTW: this thread may have been started by a moron, and looked a little like bickering from time to time, but I read the whole thing and appreciated how much it made me think... about many, many issues. Thank you all.