Quote Originally Posted by Pandora's Box
Thanks Lucy

However... this was big. I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. I don't know how quickly I'll be able to get back on the horse this time.

He had no right to induce these thoughts and feelings within me if he was going to walk away without a word.

I'm sad. I'm angry. I feel abandoned. I look at the poems and other things he sent me and can't believe what the reality is in front of me. Nothing matches up and nothing makes sense. My intuitions are confused. And so am I.
Oh, Pandora..yes, it is very upsetting and disappointing to realise that someone you had feelings for and put a lot of yourself into (emotionally and otherwise) possibly wasn't the person you believed them to be, and, if has so readily let you down then, by definition, he wasn't the person you thought he was. Hence, i can more than understand how hurt you must be and that feeling of 'being kicked in the gut', you need to take some time to look after yourself, there's no need to 'get back on the horse' straight away.

One thing - you are absolutely RIGHT when you say "He had no right to induce these thoughts and feelings within me if he was going to walk away without a word...and you must really focus on that, his behaviour is thoughtless and deeply ignorant and insensitive and it is not, in anyway your fault, regardless of something you may or may not have said in that journal that put his nose out of joint.

*hugs*

lucy x