My heart is grief stricken
Mind misplaced and floating
Harsh words at friends
Which I regret from
The moment they were spoken

I do not excuse my behaviour
Because of my poor health
But I need a little leeway
Here and there

But how were you to know
Has always been a secret
Deep within my heart
Since the fateful diagnosis

Sometimes I need to rant
Scream and throw things
Other times I need to be held
My hair stroked as I sob silently
Anguished and torn afraid of humanity

Breathing life giving air in my lungs
Praying that the next two weeks
Give me time to recollect my thoughts
So that I can muster up what little
Strength I have to hear life changing words

Afraid that I cannot speak
No one knows in real life
But a few dear to me here
In this wonderful Library
Which is my Family

Please forgive me
For my anger
Please forgive me
For my pain
Please forgive me
For wanting to be held
Please forgive me
For wanting a gentle caress
Please forgive me
For needing my friends