Apparently I misunderstood. The name of the store is "Leather, Iron, and Lace".

Which refers to riding leathers, harley-davidsons, and a corner with frilly panties and nighties.

WHOOPS.

To make matters worse I think I disturbed some old lady. Well, she disturbed ME anyway. If you're going to run a sex shop, you want someone behind the counter who doesn't care. You want shady leroy, who's reading a book all night and only looks up to take your money and not make eye contact. You don't want some sweet little old lady assaulting people with "can i help you?" as they walk in the door.
(that's my opinion anyway. I live under a rock, y'know?)

"Errr, ahh, no. Just looking around, kinda new to the area" nervous as hell now that grandma has completely fucked the situation up and knocked me off balance with her showroom of motorcycles.

I mosey around the store, pretend to look at leather jackets, pretend to look at the harleys, poke my nose into the lingerie section. Frilly panties, frilly bras, a bunch of lacy nighties. Fuck, nothing even remotely interesting. It's rather quiet and dead in here, all three employees are wondering what the hell I'm doing there.

"We have oils, and lubricants" AHHH GO THE FUCK AWAY GRANNY. sweet little old women should not speak of such things! bleeding hell, I haven't blushed since I was in gradeschool and I REALLY don't want to start now. If she tries to sell me a pocket-pussy, i'm going to blush for the next HOUR. But hey, she started the conversation, I may as well try.
"you don't happen to have any ah, local? magazines or flyers or such?" I say, looking her in the eye to guage any reaction. Deer in headlights reaction, she shows me the playboys.
"Sorry ma'am, I seem to be in the wrong store" I leave, I get in my truck, resist urge to redline my way through traffic and leave clouds of smoke...

Guess I'll have to look up the "real" porn shop around here and pay them a visit. I really, REALLY hope that Alexandria has some kind of community, somewhere... because if it doesn't, I'm going to be driving to layfayette every weekend.





As for the "ricer" comment... What I was specifically referring to was a group of three asshats with green underglow kits. One was a hatchback civic, one was a prelude, and I have no idea what the other was because he blew by me first. The ass-end looked like a teggy, but I'm still not sure.

Ricer has nothing to do with import vs domestic. It has everything to do with 20-foot spoilers, millions of decals and stickers for parts the car does not have. Claiming that an FWD economy car is capable of racing anything but grocery carts. 5-inch exhaust tips that sound like the world is ending, even though the REST of the exhaust system is still a stock 1-inch pipe. K&N filterchargers which add 100HP, combined with the 200HP that "VTEC" sticker on the door gets them....

"All show and no go" is the common definition, right?
Now if Dodge would just stop giving them ammo with those SRT-4's... *shakes fist*


I drive a Mazda, I can't bag on imports. I bag on chevvies instead :P



I hope my fumbling forrays are at least mildly entertaining :P