Although I agree with most of your overview theres one thing I really have to disagree with !!!!! "Great sex afterwards" - no way !! Great sex all the way through the session!!!! Orgasm central for her especially !!!!!
I agree that a lot of it is about power. The "power" one has when another person gives themselves to you is amazing. The degree of trust on their part is intoxicating.
The one aspect you missed out on is humiliation. Some people find this very arousing as do I but my "perfect toy" doesn't react well to this. Being as I have her interests and "lubrication" in mind I'd never push her into this area. Anyway why would I need too when I get the "yippee-ness" factor from her total submission to me *smile*