Why are so many BDSM girls fat and ugly??

[Manwhore]

Have you ever noticed that many girls into BDSM are fat and quite unattractive???

I beleive many of these women succumb to BDSM as a result of not being able to get any "normal" sex from guys and thus are forced to do BDSM to get attention

[Mobius]

Nuff Said

[Dari]

@manwhore
are you talking from personal experience? apart from the already mentioned jerk argument that's the only reason that could possibly cross my mind to let you come to such ... stupid conclusions. I can't even think of any comparison that could hold sway to that. I just call this a fake as I need something to reassure myself that there are not many people running about who are this stupid.

[Lord Douche]

I can smell smoke!

Apart from being unable to see this thread's relevance to Sexual Fantasy, I believe you should go and look at the thread Fantasy vs Stark Reality before you start too much of a flame war.

[GaryWilcox]

I'll bite...

:: assbite ::

But seriously, I think you're asking why are so many pictures of BDSM feature girls that are not as attractive as the ones in, say, the artwork of Gary Roberts?

I don't think you need the speech about people coming in all shapes and sizes, and being beautiful or ugly in all shapes and sizes, but here ya go: "Well the world don't move, to the beat of just one drum..." <g>

A few of the ladies on the forum pose for those pictures, so you might have hurt some feelings. I recommend an apology, if you were just in a glib mood and don't want to offend.

If you do mean to hurt feelings, well... you're nuts. Everybody's as beautiful as their avatar here, unless you find a way to irritate them...

:: assbite two ::

[BDSM_Tourguide]

I told you to keep your ass of this site and for this exact reason. If you're just going to be insulting and if you're not going to offer anything positive to this site, stay the hell of it.

The webmaster here, will be contacting your ISP Monday to report your continued abuse of our forums. Good bye.

[Neopadinski]

I will say, without underlying meaning (i.e. what I say is what I mean) that there are quite a few girls on the internet, real and not animated, that are unattractive. Note that I say "quite a few"-not implying a domination of unattractive to attractive females-which simply means that they are, unarguably, not attractive. That much is for certain. However, there are in quite a few places that one can find good-looking females.

As for why the unattractive females are on the internet-sure, it might be because they can't get attention from the people around them, and therefore turn to a website. I doubt that all people agree with that concept-it could be because they are interested in BDSM, want to share it with the world, but are unattractive. The motives of these people are, quite simply, none of my business.

Then, there is the concept that one doesn't find very, very beautiful women because they are quite popular and don't have time to be on a website; they are camera shy; they already have a male-friend that is willing to satisfy her BDSM "cravings", if you will. These too, are none of my business.

I frequent Artemis Artone's site quite often, and I think she is great-looking. She is probably very popular-she seems nice enough, from the little tiny bit I've seen of her on the forums; she obviously has a male-friend; and she obviously isn't camera shy. This is an example of a BDSM girl that is attractive online.

Ok, I think I worded the above correctly...I didn't want to be offensive, I simply wanted to add my input. Keep in mind that it's just my opinion

[Youngsubboston]

For starters as people have said "beauty is in the eye of the beholder". If you are as closed minded as you seem whipit then I feel bad for you becuase you are missing out on a lot of beautiful woman on the inside and outside. I myself, no matter how "hot" a girl is, can find her ugly if she a bitch, and no matter how "ugly" a girl is, if she is an aswome girl, I can look in her eyes and see the most beautiful person the whole world. Your for example, no matter what you looked like, I would find you ugly becuase your personality is so ugly and judgemental. You need to learn to care about people for who they are and see beauty in all people becuase there is. Each culture has its own defintion of beauty, and each person have there own defintion of beauty. And if your defintion is so confined by supposedly cultural limits, thats just pathetic, especailly for someone who is into bdsm, I would expect you to be more opened minded. I hope you try and take this post to heart becuase I think it will make people around you happier. Not to mention it will probally make you much more happy. I don't know what else to say to you.

[Lord Douche]

Originally posted by BDSM_Tourguide
I told you to keep your ass of this site and for this exact reason. If you're just going to be insulting and if you're not going to offer anything positive to this site, stay the hell of it.

The webmaster here, will be contacting your ISP Monday to report your continued abuse of our forums. Good bye.

I'm guessing here that Manwhore aka Whipit has a Static IP? I can only imagine the face of the technician who reads that particular e-mail. *chuckles*

[Dari]

I wanted to apologize for my impolite reply up on the page and once more try to phrase out what I think about this topic.

As far as I have noticed there are two kinds of woman who are depicted on the net - porn stars and real women, same as with the men. Just think about how many people really look like models - far too few to ever provide that many pictures. I find it quite enticing that there are so many real women who find the courage to display there bodies for the whole world to see although they know that their bodies are not perfect. I wouldn't be so brave, although I don't consider myself belonging to that "fat and quite unattractive" group of women, and I find it kind of exhilarating that someone proposes that women who are not thin as a reed or looking like a beautyqueen have to resort to such measures as to participate in sexual activities they might even loathe just to get a guy's attention. On the contrary, I guess that women who are in for BDSM might have it in them to openly stand to their needs and have no problems with all the world seeing them, apart from some nice looking girls who are far too modest and uneasy with their own sexuality to even consider posing in front of a camera.

[GaryWilcox]

Bad Dari! No taco! <g>

Okay: there *are* cultural norms of beauty. And a vast number of the women posing for these pictures do not have slim abs and hips, large breasts, and Breck girl hair.

I still think that the quality of a photographer's work has much to do with whether or not the subject is 'beautiful'. The choice of shooting a woman raised five feet off the ground in a suspension harness from eye level means you get a lot of fat dangling and the camers sees it. Binding the body means that ropes pull around the frame of the body, and everything suffers. The subject's posture is enormously important, and without an experienced model or photographer, what you get is unflattering.

If you got head shots of the women in the photos oon the Favorite Phots thread over in General Talk, about 80% wouild pass muster for even the harshest critics. Allow them to be photographed by an experienced photographer with Playboy credits on his resume, and you lose what... another 20%?

Amatuer photographers, bad lighting, and poor choice of camera position are a large part of what decides if the subject's beauty can be found.

Cheer up, Manwhore-- plenty of nude Lara Croft pictures in the sea.

:: assbite Nombre tres ::

[Mobius]

Originally posted by RubbrSpatula
Bad Dari! No taco! <g>
:: assbite Nombre tres ::

This is totaly off topic but I dont like the topic.
So RubbrSpatula you changed your avatar from the Taco bell dog to the big brother eyes. Then why are you still talking like the taco bell dog?

Just wondering amlisly

[GaryWilcox]

I'm starting to publish work, so I need to move away from chihuahua so that I'm identifiable by my work, I guess.

But I still feel the need to be the dog, now and then.

[Neopadinski]

Oh yeah, that's right...I knew your avatar wasn't always the eyes, but I couldn't for the life of me think of what your previous avatar was.

Sorry Mobius, but I have one thing left to say about the topic.

Youngsubboston said something before about beauty being in the eye of the beholder. I agree with that-in terms of people I know in real life. With women on the internet, you don't really get to know their personalities, and most of the time all you know about them is what they look like-therefore, I'm a bit shallow, because I really only like the women that are attractive. But like I said, I won't NOT like someone just because they aren't good-looking; hell, when I first met my girlfriend I didn't find her attractive at all, but as I got to know her personality, I began to appreciate her physical appearance as well.
But back to the subject of online women, when I'm looking for someone tied up, I look for the best looking ones. This is because I'm not really into the dom/sub kind of thing, my interests lie in kidnapping scenarios where the woman is taken to be a sex toy and nothing more (in fantasy, mind you).

Hm. There I go again...yeah, I should comment that I'm real opinion-oriented, and if given the chance, I could go on and on about a topic. But I also agree that my opinion may not be right, and therefore I try not to make it sound like it is. So yeah. Just wanted to clarify because the last thing I want to do is insult someone.

[Mobius]

Originally posted by Neopadinski
Youngsubboston said something before about beauty being in the eye of the beholder. I agree with that-in terms of people I know in real life. With women on the internet, you don't really get to know their personalities, and most of the time all you know about them is what they look like-therefore, I'm a bit shallow, because I really only like the women that are attractive. But like I said, I won't NOT like someone just because they aren't good-looking; hell, when I first met my girlfriend I didn't find her attractive at all, but as I got to know her personality, I began to appreciate her physical appearance as well.
But back to the subject of online women, when I'm looking for someone tied up, I look for the best looking ones. This is because I'm not really into the dom/sub kind of thing, my interests lie in kidnapping scenarios where the woman is taken to be a sex toy and nothing more (in fantasy, mind you).

Hm. There I go again...yeah, I should comment that I'm real opinion-oriented, and if given the chance, I could go on and on about a topic. But I also agree that my opinion may not be right, and therefore I try not to make it sound like it is. So yeah. Just wanted to clarify because the last thing I want to do is insult someone.

How do you know the online Women are women at all.

They could be 43 year old plumbers Named Tina or kittenfem with 5 o'clock shadows there but crack hanging out talking sweat nothings to you in the dark. Or worse some over eager police man trying to sting you with a sex crime. Mister Kidnaper guy.

Being online is nice one can find acceptance here with out the risk of a personnel rejection.

But here I go getting off topic oh what was the topic again

Why are women in bdsm photos fat and ugly?
What a stupid ignorant thing to say.
Look no one is perfect and the ones that are perfect are to bussy trying to stay perfect to be into bdsm. SO cut them some slack pick up a whip and play nice.
you think she actuly plays at BDSM in her off time dont think so it is only a way to get the big bucks

[Neopadinski]

We're talking about TALKING to girls? I apologize. I should've specified that I was referring to just pictures on websites. As for "girls" in chat rooms-unless I have met this person in real life, and they themselves gave me that screen name, I never take their word on what they look like-even if they supply a seemingly legitimate photograph(s). Hell, I used to cyber with my girlfriend on nights we didn't bother to see each other-and she's the only one I've ever done it with. That's because I don't like the idea of the sweaty plumber named Tina.
As for pictures, I like them because you can use your imagination in regards to how the girl got into the situation she's currently in.

PS-I might add, if asked to meet someone in person, it would never be for the agreement of sexual activity, for the reason Mobius said-it could be a police officer posing as a little twelve year old girl that's posing as an eighteen year old girl. Hey, it could happen.

[burger_01]

I can't believe this thread exists

[mutt]

does it matter anyway?? BDSM is for the mind and spirit physical beauty is in the eye of the individual

[Neopadinski]

Hehe, I guess in my long, mindless rants I failed to being up that point. Go me!

[pam]

What constitutes "fat"? I've seen men say that women who are 20 lbs overweight are cows? I have customers (and I don't deal in the BBW fetish area) who tell me 300 lb women aren't fat to them.

Ugly? What is ugly? I don't consider myself attractive but not many women would if they had to compare themselves to the Jennifer Lopez' or Britney Spears' of the world.

Having said that, I've known a lot of dominant men in my life (known doesn't mean intimately, could mean via correspondence!) and many choose bigger women. A lot of bigger women have self-esteem problems (raises hand) but many don't. Some men just prefer more meat on the bones.

I recently talked with a so-called dominant male who told me he liked women over 250 lbs as he really enjoyed watching their bodies jiggle.

I see no problem with that

[MrJerseyGuy]

I don't know what ManWhore is basing the observation on...but I gotta tell ya,

My sub and love of my life is 5'3" 100 pounds and gorgeous with one of those bright white smiles that most people have to pay big bucks for. She is the one who got me into the "lifestyle" You could have knocked me over with a feather the first time she asked me to tie her up and beat her stupid!

I don't know what the "norm" is...but they are certainly not all fat and ugly!

[Curtis]

*sigh* Okay, one more time...

ManWhore is basing his observation on whatever he feels will stir up the biggest fuss. He almost certainly doesn't believe what he writes, he just knows what pushes peoples' buttons. So, he kicks the ant hill and laughs his ass off watching us all scurry about.

[Count_DUQ]

I personally love a woman what ever her size or shape... I enjoy the fun I can have and being big just means (in some cases) she is harder to damage. As sometimes I love to instill that little reminder for the next day. Tell me if I you think Im wrong but big is ok with me and more fun.

[fetish101]

This community is a minority. Why is it a minority, because it is not mainstream. Something should be taken from those two statements....

Mainstream beauty is basically the annorexic, or damn near it, girls that sell magazines. Why is there so many of them in mainstream literature/publications? Because you have a bigger sample population to draw from!!

Come on people, if 90 percent of people are "vanilla", and 90 percent of people think the incredibly skinny girl is the epitome of sexy, then that's what you're gonna see in mainstream publications.

My argument is that yes, perhaps you do see more pics on the internet (other that mainstream sites like hogtied.com) with girls that have a "little bit more to offer", but really, is this anything more than you should reasonable expect?

I think that because bdsm deals with a minority it will inherently have less "magazine perfect" girls to draw from to take pictures of.

If this bothers you terriblly, well then there are people out there that will, for the right price, take the pictures you want with the type of models you want, provided it's not something too fucked up like snuff or something similar (yeah I know there are people out there who will even take those pics..but let's not get into that kinda crap).

anyways, this is just my opinion, others should give theirs, and I'm interested what other people think on this subject.

[woodsman'sgame]

Ok not sure where to post this, but I guess this is as good a place as any.

I was reading a story last night that was written fairly well. I was enjoying it, but I got to a line that set my teeth on edge it infuriated me so much. I quit reading the story. The line was talking about an older woman who was 5 feet 8 inches and mentioned how she had never lost the weight she had gained from her pregnancy. The woman weighed 140 pounds and the reader was given the impression that she was overweight!
A woman who measures 5 feet 8 inches and weighs 140 pounds is not overweight!!!!! GEEZ! In my book and Woodsman's, she is probably too thin.

Just what is fat? What do Americans consider fat? I don't understand it.

This perverted (in my opinion) notion of beauty is why my daughter starves herself and is self conscious about her weight, even though she is beautiful and much too thin as far as I am concerned. She walks down the street and 95% of the males turn to look at her in awe (I have observed this), yet she thinks she is too heavy. Damn it!

OK That's my rant. I'm still angry.

[BDSM_Tourguide]

Originally posted by woodsman'sgame
A woman who measures 5 feet 8 inches and weighs 140 pounds is not overweight!!!!! GEEZ! In my book and Woodsman's, she is probably too thin.

Someone must have been reading a health chart. 140# is the "ideal weight" for a woman of 5'8" tall.

A woman of that height and weight isn't going to be rail thin or anything, but she's still going to be thin. It's when they're 5'10" and 120# that they get to be ridiculously skinny.

[Finding_Fantasy]

Well, I am 5'8" and I used to be 160lbs. and I thought I looked pretty good. You couldn't see any bones sticking outbut I didn't have rolls either. Of course that was back when most of the jobs I had were physical ones.

Anorexia sacres the hell out of me. I had a friend that was anorexic. When she died, she was about 70lbs. Every possible place of her body was covered in cancer, her ahir was brittle and her skin (shudders) And you know how she started?

She was a daddy's girl. She adired her father and would do anything to remain perfect in her eyes. One day, they were walking down the street and they saw a mother and daughter.. The daughter was obese. He said "No daughter of mine will ever be fat." It was shortly there after that she stopped eating. Now anorexia is a disease but it was triggered by her father's comment and her desire to remain perfect for him.

Frankly, I find it disgusting. I remember when I was in school it was disgusting to be considered skinny. My brother desperatly wanted to gain weight because he was so skinny. Unfortunately his was genetic and no matter how much he ate he stayed skinny.


I took the liberty of scanning a cartoon clipping I got from our paper nearly a year ago. I think it is pretty on topic. It is two little girls looking at some overlyskinny models/maniquins.

[Dari]

IRT finding fantasy:

I really like that cartoon
just makes me unhappy to be already grown up

[redEva]

Statistics… yeah – such a bendable science!

The fact IS that North America has the highest obesity rate. The fact IS that most people (in and out of this lifestyle) have issues to deal with. The FACT is that beauty is in the eye of beholder!

Our little community here is diverse and I am proud to say mostly tolerant! If you don’t like it here – there is plenty of other sites to go to. “porn sites where the girls have respectable bodies” are just that! Porn sites with models. Would I like to look like Opearl, Dita or Ashley – you can bet your private parts I would. Unfortunately not everyone is made to look like that.

BDSM is about Power exchange in loving and trusting relationship. So IF we work some of our demons out there – why is that wrong?

[BDSM_Tourguide]

2. There will be NO negative personal comments about ANY of the pictures posted here. The first time I read something like: "Look how fat she is" or "Oh my god! They let that out of the cage?!" then you're gone. No explanations, no excuses, you and all your posts will be deleted. These are real people making some real steps and some hard decisions to go out on a limb and post material that is close to home for them. Anyone threatening the sanctity of that trust and this confidence will be damned in my eyes and could suffer no worse fate than to burn in the inequity of lesser sites and cheap masturbatory hell. In other words, if you fuck with the people courageous enough to post in this thread, I will fuck with you!

Nice of you to drop by, Incubus. Sorry you can't stay.

P.S. Whipit. Stop trying to get in here. Go find some other people to irritate.