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  1. #61
    Versatile
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    New Orleans, LA
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    4,752
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    Quote Originally Posted by Delaquoi View Post
    So as I got into actually doing S&M in real life I tended to take the dominant role, which maybe came easiest - e.g., I found most partners that way, and I got to take my pleasure. But could it be that what really matters to me is not my role in the scene but somehow the scene itself, the dynamics of domination and submission, the story, the event? Does that make sense to anyone?
    Yeah, Delaquoi, it certainly does to me. I think the energy of the scene is a powerful draw. While I may be more dominant in the day to day aspects of our relationship, the story we write together goes where it will, with our roles changing as the energy itself ebbs and flows.
    Subvert the Dominant Paradigm!

    My Stories

  2. #62
    Registered User
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    South Carolina
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    Hey Guys. I'm Mike. I'm a switch. And VERY easily approachable about it too!

  3. #63
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    your mom's place
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    25
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    Blog Entries
    1
    Hey everyone. I'm Lei, I'm a switch, and I really enjoy both topping and subbing equally, though I have explored my domme side more thoroughly than my sub side. I'm new but really diggin' the BDSM jazz.


    which side of the heel are you on?

  4. #64
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    the Burbs
    Posts
    217
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    It would be too strange to say hello as I've been here for a while, but I was trying to where I fit in the general scheme of things.

    When I first joined I knew I was a switch (can you tell ?), but had very strong Dom feelings. Then as time went on I decided I was more sub. Now I'm definitely a switch, and realize that my emphasis is probably going to move between two extremes. Right now, I'm comfortable with that.

    I seem to be in the minority though, because I would like to switch within a monogamous relationship.
    Please don't stop playing with the switch.

  5. #65
    Sugar Coated
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    a house. heee!
    Posts
    5
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    Hellloooo! My name is Ashley, and I am 100% about my Switchery! I can not stay loyal to submission, though I have certainly tried. I suppose I would be an extremely tough-to-teach full time sub. I just way too feisty! So, I found a nice niche in both worlds. I'm fully capable of taking control, even though I am, I suppose, mostly submissive. My partner does not like me to be dominant, so that's just a side to me left totally unloved. -big pout!-

    Thanks for readin'! Muah.

  6. #66
    Registered User
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    Aug 2008
    Location
    Arizona
    Posts
    23
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    Hi all my name is Angel and I am new to this site and this life style. I am not sure where I fit so this seems to be the place to start. I do admit that I have both Dominant and submissive qualities and when it comes to play I can assume either role. I'm looking for friends who are willing to assist me on this paticular path because to be honest I don't want to get into something I can't handle. I am extremely curious about everything and really want to fully understand the dynamics of both sides. I feel torn because I love to give in and to be taken but then I also desire and enjoy the control but feel really limited on what I know or the confidence to fully assume either role. I never thought I would ever feel this comfortable talking about my most inner desires as well as having resources and support to safley explore. I would definatley like to say thank you to this site and everyone who has helped me so far throught chats or forums. Any assistance or guidance is immensely appreciated.

  7. #67
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    8
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    Hi everyone, I'm Edie, I'm new to this site but I've been into BDSM (among other things) for a good while now. I'm very open about my sexuality and experiences and I really love hearing other opinions and experiences too.
    :

  8. #68
    Registered User
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    Aug 2008
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    5
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    Hello,
    I prefer not to disclose my real name here, so I will go by Defiant Submissive. Although that is my chosen user name, I consider myself a switch with slight submissive tendencies. I love the idea of being in control of a man and then finally reaching his breaking point. When that point is reached, I would like him to take the control. Since the beginning of this fantasy goes completely against the ideas of most submissives, I call myself a switch. I am fairly new to the community, having only recently discovered that this type of relationship can be based in respect, love, and trust instead of low self esteam and abuse. If anyone has any questions, please feel free to contact me.

  9. #69
    Registered User
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    Aug 2008
    Location
    Californication
    Posts
    19
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    The name is Dart, I've got no experience except mental fantasies and what I've done to myself. All I know is that I have always instinctually known that power play is a powerful part of sex and relationships.

  10. #70
    Untamed
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    37
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    Hello all,

    As obviously stated, I am one who walks the fine line of control. I have never had a master, and I have never had a slave. But the calling for both allures me. I have gone online and such but no major roleplaying or anything.

    I am mainly a dom...that call has been with me from the moment I hit puberty. The carnal desire of finding prey and watching her (or him) squirm... the thrill of the hunt.

    The sub interest mainly came from reading a book, Kushiel's Dart by Jaqueline Carey... it is actually a really good book, one of my favorites (and no, not because of its underlying theme... although that does help a little bit =p) I thought, maybe, if there is one who has the willpower and the strength to tame me... the thought is most definately a turn-on. But lo and behold, all the peeps so far has easily fallen prey.

    I also think that, since I'm a newbie, it would be alot easier to see and experience how to Dom as a slave to a Dom. Any lady (or man) that could quell me would probably b a pretty damn good Dom, and so figure it out by experience I guess =]

    I agree with jacktar... they do tend to look down on you as a switch... chin up my fellows! we are just more versitile.. they b jealous =p
    You may tame the Tiger, but only when It choses to be tame...

    "Then imitate the action of the tiger:
    Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood,
    Then lend the eye a terrible aspect;
    Now set the teeth, and stretch the nostril wide,
    Hold hard the breath, and bend up every spirit
    To [her] full height!" - Henry V William Shakespeare

  11. #71
    warsaw was raw
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    illinois usa
    Posts
    26
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    hey. im Alexia. aka Miss Wicked. I am comfortable as a Domme. But the few times I have subbed for someone I really liked it. The mental control funner than the pain. But, those same times, My faithful sub was with me and the Dom controlled us both.. And I know that if he wasn't there, I would never have had the courage to do it. Part of what I found the best part was seeing my beautiful boytoy, happy as a clam, loving very much every minute of my 'suffering'. Part of what our Dom did was order me to be tay's slave. He more or less treated us both like barbie dolls. It was FUN! Anywho, Idk if that makes me switch. but it gave me a taste of the beautiful subspace that my starfire begs for.. omg.. hehe.

    but i may have advice for switches.. .. .. find a switch, then take turns Haha
    do geese see god?

  12. #72
    *giggles*me naughty Angel
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    East Coast
    Posts
    3
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    I'm a switch but with my last partner, I was the sub most of the time because he was a dom. Last night I got my first true taste of dominating and it was a rush. It was so hot I came three times before I let him cum. Holy fuck it was incredible!

  13. #73
    Registered User
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    Sep 2008
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    I want to learn. I'm a total switch. It's all about the tease for me and must take at least 2 hours. I'm not sure just how far to go with girls before they need a rest then restart, but want to know for real, not what porn sites make you think. Not into pain or name calling,,, just bondage games.

  14. #74
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    texas
    Posts
    17
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    Hello there, names scavanger, however I would prefer the name Jack be used, as it is the one I was given at birth. Im 20, and am new to the lifestlye, all I really know is that im not sure if Im 100% dominant, or 100% submissive, and to that end I found that At the moment I was able to enjoy both, so I call my self a switch, while Ive never had any experience with actual BDSM, and as such have no stories to tell, sorry guys.

    but yeah I hope to learn things and eventually find my place int he lifestyle.

  15. #75
    Registered User
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    Aug 2008
    Location
    Belgium
    Posts
    51
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    Hi, I am samm or just sam, and I have been reading and posting on this forum since a few weeks now. So I guess it's time I introduced myself a bit.

    I am a 23 year old guy and not sure where I belong yet, since I have no experience playing with a partner yet, either online or irl. So that makes me even more curious
    I know my submissive side and the things I enjoy and fantasize about, but will have to find out sometime whether I have a Dominant side as well... you don't know if you haven't tried it and I think it could be the most fun for both when switching
    I tend to use the word 'play' alot so I guess that describes my vision about bdsm: it should be erotic and fun in the first place!

    All the regular info is on my profile and if not feel free to ask. Looking forward to meeting new people here and see you around on the forums and in chat.

  16. #76
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    My parents basement. (Yes I'm an adult, mooching off my parents, living in their basement, My life goals are complete!!!)
    Posts
    10
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    . . .

    My name's Thomas, I'm a switch and I have NO experiance at all! (yes I'm still a virgin)


  17. #77
    bondage slut
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Las Vegas
    Posts
    13
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    Hello, I'm Rex aka LostinVegas
    I've had a lifelong interest in bondage and more.
    Then I discovered D&s and it opened a whole new avenue of experiences.
    I have tried both side of the rope (so to speak) and they both have their attraction to me.
    But it seems no matter how much I enjoy Doming/Topping the willing Ladies I have come to know and trust, I always end up having the need to submit.
    bondage slut...all tied up and no-where to go

  18. #78
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    So Cali
    Posts
    10
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    Hey everyone,

    Switch hitter that is currently a domme to teach59....love owning him and having him submit to me...although it is wonderful....I will be a slave again when the right Master makes my heart pound...

  19. #79
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Utah
    Posts
    14
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    Hia.

    My name's Brady and I've been into bondage for most of my life.

    I've tried both topping and subbing, online that is, and I really enjoyed both. I've got a little more of a submissive side but I've also been wanting to try to find my way in domming as well.

  20. #80
    Submissive's Dream
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Edmonton ,Alberta
    Posts
    4
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    Hello amanda.......maybe you need a strict , but caring Mistress.I would consider you if the need arises....does this interest you girl?

  21. #81
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    1
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    Hello

    My name is Papi's Gyrl. I'm of course a switch. Mostly, I am a submissive/bottom. My boi and I play a bit. We are a "classic" butch/femme lesbian couple but our roles go back and forth a lot. Hy has a little more experience with the Lifestyle than I do. Hy has a "Daddi" who lives has a 24/7 relationship but it's more of a paternal relationship than sexual. I am here to learn more about the Lifestyle so that my Papi and I can explore more.

  22. #82
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Indianapolis, IN
    Posts
    3
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    I was dom in my last relationship and my new girlfriend will not submit in any way So I am teaching her to Domme. Does that make me a switch?

  23. #83
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
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    Blog Entries
    1
    Hi!

    I'm Sarah

    I'm a pansexual (genderqueer) switch. I prefer to Dom only mental females. I hardly ever sub anymore. It takes a lot to inspire me to do that.

    I had been a sub irl since i could remember starting with my first girlfriend back in HS. I interject BDSM into all my relationships so that's my sub experience. Then one day i met a lovely girl trapped in a lovely boy's body who could out sub me and immediately got turned on to no end. My real life Dom experience is limited to boys who like to wear panties and take it like girls. Though online it's been a little more intense and demanding than simple sex.

    I do like humiliation and have a *lot* of little kinks. I ask a lot out of my partners. I'm demanding of both subs and Doms. I love good looking lady boys but again... I find physical attraction in a lot of different packages.

    Yeah that's me *wave*

  24. #84
    New to the Lifestyle
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Southwest Florida
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    *looking at my old introduction I posted here in 2006 and pulling it out of mothballs*

    I have mostly dabbled in the lifestyle online, and as I mentioned in a couple of other threads did a paper on the subject. I consider myself a switch as I have both Dominant and submissive tendencies. I am new to teh lifestyle and wish any advice and assistance any could give.

  25. #85
    {Leo9}
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    1,443
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blue_Monday View Post
    Hi, I'm Lisa, and I've been lurking around here for months without introducing myself. I hated to label myself as either a Domme or a sub, because I switch back and forth frequently and easily--feels like cheating sometimes!
    I am exploring a problem a bit like you mention, that is, on many lists it seems
    you have to label yourself as either or. Why?

    And a question for clarification if that is ok - what do you mean when you say that switching feels like cheating?

  26. #86
    {Leo9}
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    Aug 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by jacktar007 View Post
    Jacktar here, your friendly knotty boy.

    I have in some circles discovered that people tend to look down on us a little. Even ' a switch is sub that has not met a proper master/ mistress yet...' Disappointing to say the least, I would say.
    As mentioned earlier I have run into this a lot. Both that switching is sort of not accepted, but actually also that fem Dommes are not accepted!

    Does anyone have any explanations for this, or other comments?

  27. #87
    strength in solitude
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    1,499
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    ...

    Wow, can't believe I never introduced myself here.

    I joined the Library back in 2006 as a strict sub. But, as time passed, I realized that I was a switch.

    I currently have two subs of my own, a man and a woman, and I love them dearly. I also have just started a relationship with a dom, and we're learning more about each other every day.

    My life is good.
    Hear the passion in their voices
    See the heaven in their eyes
    Their hopes and schemes are waiting dreams of
    less than paradise
    And sometimes we make promises we never mean to keep
    For blackmail is the only deal a promise dealer sees

    Heaven hide your eyes
    Heaven's eyes will never dry...

    Arcadia -- "The Promise"

  28. #88
    Shameless irreverent
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    13
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    Hi folks. I'm new to the forum and I'm a switch! Fancy meeting y'all here!

  29. #89
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    british columbia
    Posts
    2
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    Just saying hello

    Hi,
    not sure what to put in here, Im a single male switch, I like both having the controll and like giving up controll and I am equally at ease in both rolls. I am not looking for a slave nor do I wish to be one, its just that I like a little rope and a few toys in the bedroom
    I live in vancouver and I cant imagine any other place I would rather live

    If you would like to know just ask

  30. #90
    Sarcasm with a Smile
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    99
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    I guess this is a bit of a late intro as I've been skulking around here for a few weeks-month or so. I'd say I'm pretty comfortable in identifying as a switch though I do have a definite preference for being a sub. At this point in my life I'm hanging on to quite a few dominant tendencies yet- can't say I was ever properly "trained." I doubt I'd ever to be able or even want to give up those pieces of who I am though. I'm happy with myself as is. *shrug*

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