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  1. #1
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    BDSM: relationship with children?

    So I have been wondering for awhile now if a Dom/me and sub are together but they are also raising children how you make those two work together. I don't think any kids would like to see Mommy hitting Daddy or vice versa. So if anyone has had to deal with this, I am interested in hearing any problems you ran into and how you worked through them.

  2. #2
    Electrified Non-Moderator
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    Well...starting December I'll have more to say on this...there've been a couple threads about the issue, I think it mostly comes down to how all parents deal with sex and children...try to get some nights to yourself, or find things to occupy the tykes for a while, and enjoy what you can when you can.
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  3. #3
    Happy
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    Fortunately for us, our children are older teenagers. The other night we finally had to ask our oldest son and his girlfriend to leave for a couple of hours! We've never made a secret of the fact we have sex, but our other activies might be just a little TMI for them!
    Working too much....and unfortunately not online as much as I'd like.

  4. #4
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    his_j, I am sure they also enjoyed their alone time as well...

  5. #5
    Always Learning
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    Quote Originally Posted by nightsilver View Post
    his_j, I am sure they also enjoyed their alone time as well...
    nightsilver!! Don't tell a parent something like that! Makes us go all crazy!

    As for BDSM and kids, ~sighs~ sure makes it tough to do the deed, as it were. We keep everything out of sight (not too much fun when, while visiting with the neighbor, you 3 year old walks into the kitchen with your butt plug, saying, "what's this, Mommy?" That's humiliation I can do without, thank you.) and we are severely limited in time. Sometimes we don't manage well at all. Ok, most times we don't. But every once in a while will have to be okay for right now. It just has to.

    Quote Originally Posted by ElectricBadger
    Well...starting December I'll have more to say on this...
    Congratulations!!

    Quote Originally Posted by ElectricBadger
    I think it mostly comes down to how parents deal with sex and children...try to get some nights to yourself, or find things to occupy the tykes for a while, and enjoy what you can when you can.
    Ok, good luck with that. And if you figure it out, please, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!!! Come tell me how you managed it?? Please!!

    Ok, desperation moment over.

    tessa
    "Life is just a chance to grow a soul."
    ~A. Powell Davies


  6. #6
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    Well, I feel retarded for not seeing those threads when I searched. Guess I should do searches/posts when I am not so sleepy. If any of the mods want to, feel free to delete this thread.

  7. #7
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    Well, at least i won't have to worry about it for awhile. 18-20 years just seems a bit rough. Maybe only have one kid so when they go to a sleep over or such everyone is happy.

  8. #8
    Always Learning
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    Quote Originally Posted by nightsilver View Post
    Well, at least i won't have to worry about it for awhile. 18-20 years just seems a bit rough. Maybe only have one kid so when they go to a sleep over or such everyone is happy.
    I do only have one child. I'm in complete and total awe of those who manage it with more than one bundle of chaos.

    But hey, it can be done. Desperation makes for excellent motivation.
    "Life is just a chance to grow a soul."
    ~A. Powell Davies


  9. #9
    non-toxic Ivy
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    I think the need for secrecy would diminish as the kid gets older. By the time they're a teenager they won't be traumatized to learn that their parents are kinky - just kinda grossed out to realize that you're having sex at all. ^_^
    I'm not even angry, I'm being so sincere right now
    Even though you broke my heart, and killed me
    And tore me to pieces
    And threw every piece into a fire
    As they burned, it hurt because
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  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by NatalieD View Post
    I think the need for secrecy would diminish as the kid gets older. By the time they're a teenager they won't be traumatized to learn that their parents are kinky - just kinda grossed out to realize that you're having sex at all. ^_^
    Um, I'm way away from teenager-hood and I would be irrevocably traumatized to find out my parents are kinky.

    You said it true, Natalie. Grossed-out works.

    ~shudders at the thought~ Ick.

    I'm still such a child. ~sighs~
    "Life is just a chance to grow a soul."
    ~A. Powell Davies


  11. #11
    slave Goddess
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    Quote Originally Posted by tessa View Post
    Um, I'm way away from teenager-hood and I would be irrevocably traumatized to find out my parents are kinky.

    .I'm still such a child. ~sighs~
    Well, how do you think your Mom would feel at finding out her daughter is a r/l submissive wishing to be bound and spanked, and kinky Supermod at the BDSM forum?

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  12. #12
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    For what it is worth, I have gone by my parents door before getting a late night snack and heard sounds of them doing it in addition to me not knocking once when I was around 7. ^^;

  13. #13
    non-toxic Ivy
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    My parents' bedroom was above mine, and when I was younger I would frequently hear them going at it. The worst part was being able to tell exactly when my father came by the way he sighed. *shudder*

    And yet, I turned out all right.

    ...

    Ok, that's a lie, I'm totally screwed up. But I'm pretty sure that stuff isn't why. ^_^
    I'm not even angry, I'm being so sincere right now
    Even though you broke my heart, and killed me
    And tore me to pieces
    And threw every piece into a fire
    As they burned, it hurt because
    I was so happy for you!

  14. #14
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    I have found that sending them to grandma's is a wonderful way for us to have our time, and now that they are older we have had a few sleep overs that invloved a tent in the back yard so we were not interupted, but we have found for the most part play fighting in front of them has been the best form of cover. When ever they hear the sound of a slap they think its me smacking dad for something!!!!

  15. #15
    nk_lion
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    I have never heard or seen or in any way realise that my parents were going at it. But I did buy a vacation getaway for them once hoping that they would get intimate, have an accident, and give me a baby brother or sister. Didn't happen .

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