i'm not trying to be a prude, here...

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Originally Posted by alittlecuriousgirl

oh hell. see--that's the stuff i worry about. any help????
-curious

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Use your own best common sense.

By the same token, question anyone your own age who claims themselves an experienced dominant... no one is ever through learning, and experience does require time spent. Not just book learning and internet reading.

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Originally Posted by jeanne

This is where it comes in handy to have some friends among the submissives in your local community. It makes me sad to see newbies come into the community and focus only on finding the "Dom of their dreams". I always advise new submissives to focus on getting to know other submissives. Make friends, find out if there's a submissive discussion meeting or roundtable, and reach out. Then, when you do meet a Dom, you have a group of submissives that you can ask "what do you know about so-and-so? Have you ever played with him? Would you play with him again?" etc.

Really though. If you plan to join your local community, make friends. Then worry about the Dom-hunt.

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An excellent approach everyone can follow.

Also excellent in getting a head start toward meeting dominants in your community, you'll see who the subs talk about, who they hang around with, who they avoid.

Don't just talk to the submissives either... everyone in the community is worth talking to when it comes to asking about how people play. Even if they don't know personally, they could lead you to someone who does.

My Dom has been in the local community longer than I have and he's already told me about how certain other people play and who I am absolutely NOT to play with.