Growing submissive feelings

Hi.

I guess I feel pretty strange, posting here, when I've been a member for a while, but never posted in the forums. I've kinda lurked, reading conversations like a peeping Tom lol. I've definitely learned a lot from just reading opinions. So I've decided to ask your thoughts about my inner dilemma.

I've been with my Dom/Master for a few months now, and it's one of those cases that I feel like I've known him for much, much longer. I've read some not-so-approving thoughts about online relationships. I myself feel mostly comfortable in mine.

So my question is directed mostly to subs, but I'd love any answers. Lately I feel like I've fallen a lot deeper than ever into my submission and it feels strange. Like I should be careful, yet give him everything I've got at the same time. Have you ever felt like this? Like you can feel his physical presence, even if he's states away from you? It makes me wary, as I don't have such good history with guys, emotion-sharing wise.

:) Thanks for any answers.

While I always advise caution for anything online, I know that while it wasn't a Dom/sub relationship (especially as I turned out to be even less of a switch I thought I could be, so making us two 'alphas') - though I opened up about my sexuality like with no one else before - I met my fiancé online, and we only met in real life about a year after having been 'together'. I had had bad experiences offline and online before, but he was different in a very good way.

I think that as long as there is communication and caution, things can transition from online to real life very well if the person involved is the right one.

Life is short, enjoy yourself but use your head. You know the pain of loss, as most of us do and the feelings of happiness that you and he share, so if you want more than online learn to share with him everything, from your fears to your greatest joy, I know you want r/l at some point so you are allowed to protect yourself and hold back a little...no need to give him your bank account numbers and social.. just use your head and don't get lost in the online world but continue to push forward and grow as person and as a sub. Make him prove to you that he's worth your effort, but most of all be happy with you...good luck kitten.your friend MR

Kitten,
There is nothing wrong with the feelings you are having. i too met my D online and grew to love and cherish Him...O/our relationship has deepened into so much more than i ever could have hoped for. W/we share i hold no secrets from Him, nor does He with me. W/we now have an o/l and r/l relationship, and since W/we have began the r/l part of it the love and level of submission i feel for Him have increase 100 fold and it seems to grow more each day. Your relationship is what you make of it. I hope that you take things safely and slowly but, don't stop yourself from your growing feelings. *huggles and smooches*

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Originally Posted by kurious-kitten

Hi.

I guess I feel pretty strange, posting here, when I've been a member for a while, but never posted in the forums. I've kinda lurked, reading conversations like a peeping Tom lol. I've definitely learned a lot from just reading opinions. So I've decided to ask your thoughts about my inner dilemma.

I've been with my Dom/Master for a few months now, and it's one of those cases that I feel like I've known him for much, much longer. I've read some not-so-approving thoughts about online relationships. I myself feel mostly comfortable in mine.

So my question is directed mostly to subs, but I'd love any answers. Lately I feel like I've fallen a lot deeper than ever into my submission and it feels strange. Like I should be careful, yet give him everything I've got at the same time. Have you ever felt like this? Like you can feel his physical presence, even if he's states away from you? It makes me wary, as I don't have such good history with guys, emotion-sharing wise.

:) Thanks for any answers.

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hello and i am glad that you are posting :)

The issue your raised reminded me of a blog entry of mine, a few years ago, please allow me to post it there, as you may find it useful, or at least not ugly ;)

I have nothing against online D/s and absolutely no bad experiences with it. It has its problems, though.

The post of the blog is as follows, please, take as much as you can and use it for your joy.
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"Eerie" moments are some moments of total completeness, arousal and happiness in a feeling of submission, when alone and in full inner balance. One such moment had happened in August three years ago. i had been allowed to go to the movies, i was alone and afterwards i went out in a small and very beautiful park near the cinema. There, in the wooden bench and under the August moonlight, i felt very full of my Trainer, complete and very happy. As if He was not only there, but inside me, around me, on top of me and everywhere. i thought that this very nice "eerie" feeling was due to my Trainer. i was terrified that all my moments of happiness were about to be with me alone and Him just overseeing the situation. i didn't like this at all. Funnily, i had become full of denial after those moments, earning myself a very nice punishment but absolutely no closeness by His part.

It happened to me again, this time under the August moonlight of this year, ha ha ha. i was in my veranda, after midnight, in total silence, and it was as beautiful as ever. But now i was a free person and not a trainee slave. The completeness and happiness were the same, although the situation different. Then i knew that it was me that i was making my happiness, not any other person, no matter how important the gift of His dominance to me.

Hello kitten and thank you so much for your post. What you have to say hits very close to home for me. i have been with my Master for only a few months as well and O/our relationship is online (for now, W/we are planning on making it r/l as soon as possible). i think when we find our One we experience the feelings you describe i know i have. He gets me like no one ever has and i get Him the same way. i was pretty new coming into my submission when W/we met. i was still a bit unsure about what i was looking for and what my desires were. Before W/we ever even spoke privately i was drawn to Him, i had read some of His posts and W/we had flirted some in the Fun and Games threads, then i sent Him a PM and W/we have been inseperable since. When W/we first started chatting i was a little reserved and shy about some things and every day i felt and still feel myself coming more and more into my submission to Him and more and more alive, i finally feel like me :) it is a strange and a little scary feeling because how can someone get me so completely and make me feel the way He does...but it's so beautiful and although i am His completely i feel freer than i have ever felt in my life (if that makes any sense). As far as His physical presence...He is on the East coast and i am on the West Coast but i feel him with me always. When W/we are together and in play online and He commands me to do things to myself yes technically it's me doing them but in my mind and the mindframe i am in it's Him doing them, it's His hands touching my skin not mine. Friends of mine that know of my relationship to Him ask me all the time and people have asked it here in the threads as well how can online get it done well it's all up to Y/you, it can work and be the most amazing experience you have ever had if you allow it to be and let yourself go, i know it has been for me :) i'm not sure if i have helped in anyway but if anything you will know you are not alone in your feelings. i think it's a natural thing to experience as you and your Master and all of U/us in the lifestyle experience as W/we travel along in O/our journies. Sometimes when we are most happiest we find ourselves questoning things because we have a hard time accepting that things really can be this good. Be happy and enjoy, and take care ~jacee
P.S. if you ever wanna talk please feel free to PM me :)