Conversation Between Lagomorph and seamedblackstockings

I left that gift for you to enjoy WD, and this is how you repay me? Revenge...

~~Orange footprints lead the way onto your wall, the only sgn that there is any trouble to be found. Walking into the room, you won't see the loop of rope on the floor, waiting to scoop you up. That's where the fun begins. The rope moving along will trigger the lighting of 100 candles, to celebrate the 100th time you have been a pain in my arse. As the candles melt....the wax drips onto the scales below, lifting you higher, towards the ceiling fan....don't worry though. I replaced all those pesky fan arms with floggers...they make such a nice sound, swooshing there. enjoy~~

Oh, and .....Stay away from my bloody wall....you two just don't have the skills to lay traps like this. ~sighs~

~*~ giggles at the orange paint running all down BFFs head ~ *leans in closer looking .. OMG *pokes WD ~ is BFF wearing that frilly dress and those flat smelly shoes from the ACME kit? ~*~

~*~ walks in at 5am shielding my eyes and my Eric doll's eyes immediately *BFF i cry .. It didn't have to be like this! Limp away faster .. NOW .. while you still have use of your shorter leg ~*~

~GLOMPS~ Please BFF...the things I will do, the traps I will lay, devices I will create just to destroy you two...I don't want to put you through that. Just let it go...

~walks away, limping with my pimp cane and twirling a silver key on one finger~

~*~ *blinks .. *takes notes .. is even worse than i first thought ... mmhmm yes .. mhmmm .. this certainly bumps things up a notch .. mmhmmm .. no no .. some prior indication but not to this level of .. of demented serverity .. mmhmm ~ nods to WD yes Sir I will put that on the list .. *blinks again .. following WD out ~*~

~*~ laughs ... knowing all the villagers are on vervain .. muahahahah .. watching you squirm with your ear and one foot caught in the trap laid by my Hero! ~*~

~befriends the villagers, earning their trust with promises of riches and a place at the side of the great space dog who watches over us in the afterlife. Starts a cult with them, the worshippers of the key, and celebrates the day of release with the nubile women of the village. Proclaims that all the men of the cult must wear chastity belts except for our leader, (me) and has them guarding the key, hidden under a feindish set of puzzles~

~*~ ties you to the stake in the middle of the village ~ sewing a note to your chest "Dear Villagers ~ I ate the key to your food storage shed please feel free to remove it however you like! ~*~

~Spots the laser beam before the tranq dart is fired, swallows the key and flips you the bird before passing out inside the locked cage.~ Heheh, Eric will never be free...I shall spend the rest of my life smiling at his impotence while you cry.